Judaism is distinct from many other traditions, among them Christianity and secular Islam. In Judaism marriage is a contract between the two spouses, with no involvement of a third party.The legal relationship takes effect from the moment the woman willingly accepts the ring from her husband, and not at the decree of a representative from the religious or civil institution. The other participants in the ceremony- the Rabbi as well as the witnesses who lend validity to the transaction, the blessings, and the various other customs that create the religious and moving framework of the event -- are in their essence secondary to the Bride and Groom in the actual wedding ceremony. In the Catholic religion, an individual is not qualified to sever ties that were created under God and church, and in civil marriage only a municipal representative (a judge or justice of the peace) is authorized to end the legal relationship initially rendered in a civil setting. However, in Judaism the spouses themselves are they who can sever the ties of marriage.The Jewish tradition assigns a high value to marital relationships: "tears fall onto the altar at their separation". [2]
Nonetheless, they do not constitute a metaphysical, irreversible connection.And as the spouses themselves are the only ones who may establish the marriage's commencement, they, and only they, may decide when it ends. This model empowers the spouses and imbues them with ownership over their personal status.
In the textual law, only the husband is authorized to write a sefer kritut (a divorce document); as far back as the eleventh century,a divorce only takes effect if and when the woman receivesthis document knowingly and willfully.Free will is thusanessentialelementin the divorce process. Like other civil transactions, a get that was signed by means of coercion or without knowledge of its content by signers is not valid.It is treated as a falsified document, which does not reflect the true intent of the signing parties.A get me'useh, a divorce which is forced upon one party in an illegal fashion, does not annul a marriage.It is precisely the power vested in each spouse that leaves each helpless to coerce the other, notwithstanding either's desire to do so.
The Jewish tradition's constant identification and empathy with the agunah and the mesurevet get manifests itself in Rabbis' and communities' tireless efforts to locate missing husbands and their varied and creative attempts to free women and protect them using the halachic system.Halachic literature testifies to this ongoing contention: of all the attitudes considered in the chapter, the option not to help an aggrieved woman at all never crossed the sages' minds.In our day, the problem has become more grave and severe than any precedent.While judges are still investing substantial effort in locating lost husbands and solving the agunah problem, all too often they do not recognize or acknowledge the halachic significance of freeing mesuravot get. And if in the past the responsibility for the law and its application was in the hands of rabbis and judges from relatively small communities, today we see a concentration of halachic authority in the hands of federal and political entities.Small communities who used to utilize communal pressure (even physical pressure, at times) on violent mesarvim (refusing husbands) have all but disappeared; in their place is a large and impersonal community, one that enables a spouse to exploit the legal system, and one that leaves the victims of that exploitation to survive or fall alone. The small, local community hasrelinquished itsauthorityto the larger community, and with it, the responsibility to protect and listen to the voices of the weak and silenced among them.
[2] Gitin 90A.